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I Just Learned My Mom Has a Secret Account With Plenty of Cash. What I Want to Do Next Isn’t Exactly “Fair.”

Slate’s column on money is called Pay Dirt. Have a question? Here’s where you can send your question to Kristin or Ilyce. (It’s anonymous!)
Please Pay Dirt
Candice, my mother’s best friend from many years back was contacted recently by a relative. Candice and mom fell out several years prior. We don’t know what really happened. Candice’s cousin has contacted me to let me know that Candice passed away and that my mother had her bank account.
My mom is now suffering from dementia, so I had no idea about this account. Since I am the power of attorney for my mother, I must sort out this mess. There’s an amount of money in the account, around $80,000.
The issue is: it’s obvious that Candice’s family wants me to give some (possibly half) of the money on the account. Legally, I understand that it is all my mother’s money now that Candice passed away. Realistically, I know (given the respective financial situations) that Candice probably put money into this account while my mother did not. (But I’m not sure). Candice’s family is in a difficult situation. I am sorry for them, but I also want to admit that I wouldn’t have known about the account if they hadn’t told me. My mom needs the money because her medical costs have increased by $1400 per month. It’s hard to balance what is fair for Candice’s family with the needs of my mother. I’d like to donate $25,000-$30,000 to Candice’s estate, and the remainder to my mother. Does that seem fair? Does that seem generous to you?
Joined in the middle
Please Stick to Me
You’re faced with a difficult decision because you don’t want to waste the money you have on a vacation that you will never take. Instead, you are forced to choose between two moral choices. You want to take care of your mother, who relies on you for her medical needs and is dependent upon you. You also want to be fair to Candice’s parents.
You’re correct legally–the full balance of a joint bank account belongs to your mother. You’d have to put her care needs first, especially with the dementia she has and her rising costs. You want to strike a balance between compassion and fairness.
In terms of ethics, offering $25-$30k to Candice and her family strikes me as a good middle ground. It’s not too extravagant but it’s also not too cheap. A consultation with an estate lawyer would not hurt, however. They won’t give you an answer that is clear-cut, but can help structure your transfer to ensure it goes smoothly, with documentation, and without conflict. They’ve likely seen similar situations before and may have some insight on what they did.
–Kristin
Classic Prudie
It is “traditionary” in my husband’s extended family to pass on baby gear to the next expecting family member. As an only child, I respect the tradition, but the majority of items aren’t worth much. They’re onesies, threadbare bears and beat up strollers. Many of the items are not safe for use. The family was upset when I sent them a recall notice about the car seat that my cousin-in law had given me for my second baby. They wouldn’t stop talking until I dropped the topic.

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HealthNews

Birth order may predict risk for allergies, psychiatric disorders and substance use

You can now hear Fox News stories!
According to a new, massive study, the age of a sibling can affect health later in life.
Researchers from Columbia University and the University of Chicago analyzed medical data collected from 10,000,000 U.S. sibling siblings for two decades. They found that there may be a link between birth order and specific health risks.
Researchers examined 569 categories of disease across families, and found 150 that had a significant relationship with the birth order.
LONGER LIFE, BAD HEALTH? Scientists Discover a Troublesome Trend Across Generations
The first-born child showed an increased likelihood of receiving neurodevelopmental or psychiatric diagnosis, such as autism, ADHD and Tourette’s syndrome, and immune-allergic disorders like food allergies.
Statistics show that second-borns are more likely to suffer from migraines, shingles and substance abuse disorders. They also have a higher risk of gastrointestinal problems like gastritis.
While discussing the results on Fox & Friends, Dr. Marc Siegel (senior medical analyst at Fox News) noted the importance of such a large-scale research.
The doctor stated, “I like this study as it raises more questions than answers. But I do think I know some of the answers.”
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Siegel’s own theory about parenting behavior was offered in response to the increased prevalence of ADHD with first-borns.
My theory is that they are getting more stimulation. He said that the parents hover over their children, like helicopters. “They don’t even know what to do,” he added.
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Siegel, in addressing the disparity between allergic conditions and the early exposure to the environment, said, “I believe it is because the immune system of the firstborn has not seen the environmental before.” If it is not properly set, then you will get an allergic reaction.
Siegel also discussed biological and psychological aspects when evaluating the differences between sibling.
I think that the womb is different after the first pregnancy, so the second baby will have a used womb. He said that the womb is more prepared for it because it has already been used.
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Siegel, in a response to the increased rate of substance abuse disorders among children born second, suggested that emotional factors may also be at play. “It could all come down to the same thing: I want attention. I’m looking for attention. “I want to do something that will make you laugh.
The study has some limitations, even though it highlights trends across a wide population.
These findings show correlations, not direct causality, which means that the trends aren’t always due to physiological changes, early microbe exposures, or social dynamics.
The data also relies heavily on the commercial health insurance claims which may reflect different diagnoses, differences in healthcare seeking behavior, and parental attention, rather than just true biological functions.
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These associations are also complicated by factors such as age differences between parents and siblings. Researchers concluded that birth order is a risk indicator at the population level, rather than an accurate health predictor.
Nature Health published the research.

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HealthNews

West Nile Virus found in one-third of mosquitos sampled within Salt Lake City district

County health officials report that West Nile Virus has been detected in 35 percent of mosquitoes screened this week at the Salt Lake City Mosquito Abatement District. This represents a risk “significantly greater than normal” for the virus.
Salt Lake County Health Department officials announced on Wednesday that a second case of West Nile virus was also reported. On July 30, the county reported its first case of West Nile virus of the year.
West Nile Virus, the virus most commonly spread by mosquitoes and which has a wide range of effects on humans.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, some people will not show symptoms. However, they can develop headaches, body aches, and fever within two to fourteen days. The severe cases may result in high temperatures, stiff necks, confusion, muscle convulsions or even death.
Salt Lake County Health Department advises people to:

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HealthNews

Bat tests positive for rabies after getting caught in Olympic National Park hiker’s hair

The rabies test results for the bat, which swooped and caught a woman in her hair near Staircase Bridge at Olympic National Park have been confirmed. Health officials are urging the woman to get medical treatment and any other person who has had contact with this animal.
A rabid swarming bat was discovered Sunday, near Staircase Bridge. Olympic National Park issued a warning on Wednesday that the bat was briefly caught in the hair of an unidentified female at about 2 pm.
Mason County Health Department, 360-427-9700, Ext. 405.
Health officials said that the bat also attacked other people in the vicinity, but it was not known if anyone else came into contact with the bat.
If you have been in contact with bats, but were not bitten by one, contact your local health department and a doctor to see if treatment is needed.
If you are concerned about a pet’s direct contact with bats, contact your veterinarian.
The rabies virus is deadly and can infect any mammal. Bats are the main carriers. The virus can be transmitted by the saliva of infected animals or their bites or scratches.
Small bites or scratches from bats may be inconspicuous and not painful. If you believe that you may have come into contact with a Bat, it is important to immediately consult a healthcare provider in order to assess the risks of exposure.
When medical attention is sought promptly following exposure, rabies can be avoided.
According to park officials, Washington has a large number of bats that are in good health.
According to park officials, bats have an important role in the ecosystem. This includes pest control, pollination and seed dispersal.
The Olympic National Park does not allow visitors to touch, handle or feed bats. If you see a dead bat or if it is alive, keep your distance. Notify the park staff.

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HealthNews

Student, 19, Dies After Taking Drug Used by Millions of Americans

According to reports, the Californian teenager was found lying on her bathroom floor.
The 19-year old college student who died was found to have taken a popular GLP-1 drug for weight loss.
Josephine Nasr died on September 23, 2025, in the dorm of her London college after she took tirzepatide.
Under the brand names Mounjaro or Zepbound, this popular drug belongs to a class of drugs called GLP-1/GIP receptor-agonists.
Gallup’s National Health and Wellness Index shows that 15 percent of Americans take a weight-loss medication. This includes “semaglutide, (brand names Ozempic, Wegovy, and liraglutide, (brand name Saxenda) or tirzepatide, (brand names Mounjaro, Zepbound, and Mounjaro).
According to The Times of London (which reported Nasr began taking Zepbound in summer 2025), Nasr received Zepbound from a U.S. physician. Nasr wasn’t obese but her BMI was classified as “overweight.”
Nasr told her family that she felt nauseous and was vomiting the night before her death. She was enrolled in her second-year of legal and international studies at East London University and was planning to graduate by 2027.
According to Cleveland Clinic, GLP-1s can cause nausea or vomiting.
Anastasia Nasr was worried about her sister’s dehydration, and so ordered Nasr IV fluids. After she couldn’t reach her by phone, Anastasia Nasr contacted the security team at the college.
Nasr was found on the bathroom floor by the team when they entered Nasr’s room. It was around two hours since Nasr last spoke to her family on the telephone.
The Times reported that next to her, there was an empty GLP-1 vial.
Nasr died on the spot after an ambulance arrived.
On August 3, an inquest was conducted at the East London Coroner’s Court regarding Nasr’s demise. The coroner Graeme Irvine determined that cardiac arrhythmia was the cause of her death.
In his postmortem, pathologist Alan Bates determined that Nasr suffered from a condition of the heart known as myocardial bridge. The coronary artery usually runs above a heart muscle, but in this case, the artery passes through the muscle.
The condition is not harmful to health but can lead to chest pain. It is estimated that between 16 to 30 percent of all people were born with the condition.
Bates stated that vomiting caused by tirzepatide may have led to low blood sugar and an electrolyte balance that might have resulted in arrhythmia. Nasr, he said, was an “otherwise healthy young woman”, but her heart condition could have contributed negatively to the outcome.
Lorin Mansour – Nasr’s mom – reportedly fainted upon hearing the news.
She was always happy and put others first. George Nasr said that Nasr loved to travel and enjoy the ocean.
Mansour said, “Josephine’s willingness to assist others showed her commitment to the Coptic faith.”
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As measles outbreaks grow in the U.S., maps and charts show a record number of cases

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDCP) data show that the United States has seen the highest number of measles outbreaks in the past three decades, as the disease spread across multiple states.
Mid-July saw the total surpass 2025 which was the worst year of recent times with over 2,200 cases confirmed. The U.S. is at risk of losing the official status it holds since 2000, that has been attributed to them for eliminating measles.
The measles virus is highly contagious. It can sometimes cause serious infections of the brain and lungs that may lead to deafness, cognitive problems, or even death. Vaccination is a safe, highly effective and medically proven way to prevent it.
CBS News’ data team tracked measles confirmed cases across the country as state health departments released new data.
More than 750 of the 2,289 cases confirmed last year were linked to an outbreak that occurred in West Texas and led to two deaths.
Before 2025, prior to 2019, the most recent year with the largest number of confirmed cases was 2019. This was driven by outbreaks occurring in New York State, California, and Washington. The total number of cases was usually much lower.
Experts in health care point out that the increase of infectious diseases such as measles is primarily due to decreased vaccination rates. Most cases are in unvaccinated people, and the outbreaks spread to communities that have lower vaccination rates.
CDC data show that approximately 93% of U.S. kindergarteners were vaccinated for measles in 2021-2022 and only 92.7% during 2023-2024. It is down from the 95.2% in the school year 2019-2020 — an important threshold for keeping people safe. This threshold was only reached by 10 states.
The CDC says that “when more than 95 percent of the people living in a given community have been vaccinated,” they are most likely to be protected by herd immunity.
On “Face the Nation With Margaret Brennan”, Dr. Jay Bhattacharya of the National Institutes of Health said, “I believe that it is very important for parents to vaccinate children, particularly for the measles, the DTP and all the childhood standard vaccines.”

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